Music, books, and personal thoughts on life

Schizotypal Personality Disorder and Creativity

I mentioned in my updated introduction that I have  Schizotypal Personality disorder, along with Major Depression and A.D.D.  If you have ever seen the movie ‘Taxi Driver’ with Robert De Niro from 1976, his character is a textbook example Schizotypal.  I could sit here and describe it all, but I’m not writing a psychology blog.  As long as I can remember, I always liked being alone and not around too many people.  I was always creating plays and stuff in my head.  No one has really been able to understand why I am the way I am.  Basically no one knows how to take me.  I knew I was different and didn’t understand it myself either.  When I had my breakdown in 2011, it was then when I found out how I tick.  Psychological testing couldn’t really nail down if I had Asperger’s or Schizotypal personality disorder.  A counselor finally said that there is no way I could be an Aspie, since I can hold good conversations.  When I described some of my behavior and thought patterns to her, she said I fit more into the Schizotypal realm.  Having this along with Major Depression helps me come up with ideas for songs.  I have a problem though, I hear the song playing in my head, but can’t seem to translate it onto guitar or keyboards.  Thankfully I am friends with a couple of musicians who can get in my head to hear what I am hearing.  For me, writing lyrics is like therapy.  Whatever I’m feeling can be channeled into words and music as a release.  Lately, I have been writing some pretty dark poems and lyrics that would probably freak out some people who know me.  I believe that people who have mental illnesses are some of the most creative people out in the world.  Some of them take their energy and use it towards creativity.

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